New third grade teacher Mr. Granite has so many strange ideas about how to make Ella Mentry School environmentally friendly that the students are sure he must be an alien.

Second grade graduation turns into a full-blown spectacle when an overzealous PTA president pulls out all the stops for A.J. and his classmates on the last day of school.

Ella Mentry School counselor Dr. Brad believes wisecracking A.J. may be a genius and subjects him to some very weird tests to find out for sure.

Ella Mentry School's security guard proves overzealous in his pursuit of a peanut-butter-and-jelly-sandwich thief.

When a British student-teacher arrives, A.J. and his friends wonder if her all-black clothing and love of blood sausage mark her as a vampire, while Mr. Granite simply hopes her musician-boyfriend will stay away long enough for a math lesson.

Help With the Recess Enrichment Program, A.J. and the gang have to take classes even during recess The new teacher, Mrs. Lizzy, teaches how to make balloon animals, how to compost worms, and lots of other weird useless skills that nobody would ever want to know in a million hundred years.